Archived Messages
from July 10th to August 22, 2003
Mary, Mary, quite contrary,
How does your garden grow?
oops. um, i guess we needn't answer that question.
urrummuh, well and healthy we hope.
Mark 8-22-2002 23:01
Carol,
Look up.
Your moon sounds just like our moon.
Pollution in the atmosphere turns it pink/red if it is rising in the dusk. The
shallow angle to the surface means that the light from it travels through much
more dust etc. than it does when it approaches its zenith, whereupon it turns
silvery white.
Ed
Eddie 8-22-2002 16:59
Hi All :)
It's a hazy, humid day today. My computer doesn't like it and neither do I, but
I'll work us both anyways. :)
Mary - a very big congratualtions and {{{HUG}}} I will send good wishes that your
headaches disappear into the mist. My hubby gets migraines and I have suffered
once or twice in the past so I do understand the pain associated with them.
I have a question for any of our sci/fi writers out there -- I've been trying
to find a scientific backup for a feature I want on my "world" -- the feature,
a moon which goes from white to pink to red and back again. What atmospheric conditions
would cause this and how would it affect the planet and lives of its inhabitants
(outside of the emotional/religious aspects)? So far I haven't been able to find
a site to help me with this question and I'm running out of ideas for keywords/phrases
to plug into search engines. My advance thanks for any ideas. :D
I did go the route of doing research all this week. Oh, what wonderful ideas I
found! Now its a matter of getting back into the story and filling in all these
wonderful ideas. If anyone ever needs it, I found a Shaman site that holds the
wisdom power of over 300 animals.
Tina - I just discovered one of my nephews is going to take a tandem jump for
his 18th birthday. I'm not sure who is braver, him for wanting to do the jump,
or his mother for taking a bunch of his friends with them on the excursion! hehehehe
At least from your posts, my anxiety level isn't as high as it would be without
it. Thanks for that. :) See the effect of your work? And thank you too for the
good vibes, I needed that.
Now, I'd best get back to writing before another day disappears on me.
Be healthy and happy everyone!
Carol 8-22-2002 16:01
ELAINE: You are an inspiration to us all. It's time we picked up our pens
and got to it.
Good girl, well done.
Teekay 8-22-2002 1:59
Got the URL wrong on that last post. BTW, in case others did not notice.
Tobias Buckell, a past visitor to the Notebook, is up for Hugo Award as part of
Tangent Magazine and also a nominee for a John W. Campbell Award. Nice to see
others doing well who began visiting here in the past.
Jack Conjose
8-22-2002 1:27
Belated great congratulations, Jerry. Glad to see that our written words
are getting themselves out and about and you deserve hearty pats on the back.
Trying to get things together before heading down to Worldcon. That and getting
use to my new dry suit. BTW, we were out at Cove 1 about a week ago and got buzzed
by a harbor seal and I caught it all on video. If you are interested, I have included
it on my Northwest Diving Videos page - http://www.fenwithfins.org/divingvideos.html
Take care everyone and, yes, I will get around to archiving before I leave for
California. Take care everyone.
Jack Beslanwitch Conjose
8-22-2002 1:22
Mary - Congrats! (They found out what causes that you know) Just kidding)
So happy for you, but sorry to hear of the head pain. My VA Doc told me that the
only one she ever heard of taking Toradal (A med I take daily) was one of the
VA Patients who take it im for migraines. She said it works great for that too.
May try to get something done for shorty night, I've missed that a bunch, in fact
I haven't written much lately, too many computers and not enough time! I've been
fixing my sisters, her daughters, my daughters, now my wife's is on the blink,
damn things, I should just put linux on all of them, but then I'd have to teach
everyone how to run Linux, and that's another pain, but at least Bill Gates wouldn't
be giving me migraines. (Well not migraines, but headaches none-the-less.)
Now that we have Mary back, where's Debra?
Jerry Robot surgery
8-22-2002 0:33
Hi All,
MARY: CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!! I am soooo happy for you. The headaches
you describe definitley sound like migraines.
EDDIE: Heard on the news 2 nights ago about how a 30 year old woman was going
to be stoned to death under sharia law for having a child out of wedlock.
Apparently the ruling pleases the vast majority of Moslems in Nigeria.
Stoning - imagine it, how totally barbaric is that???? Seems that monsters don't
always hide under the cover of darkness and slither away under the glare of observation.
Sometimes they name it religion and call it good.
About those people who have had a hard time of it through childhood. I don't imagine
that all people who lack conscience come from that background. I'm willing to
bet that there are cold blooded murderous who cause harm through sheer sociopathy.
I think I said it right :-D
My view points are fairly diverse.
When I said about how you felt about the girls siply because you knew of the town,
again, I wasn't trying to be judgmental, again it was an observation.
My heart broke when James Herriott died. Didn't know him, never met him, had no
idea what his favourite colour was and wouldn't know him if I fell over him in
the street. James Herriott wasn't even his real name, but he was brought close
to me through his work.
Be well all.
Teekay 8-21-2002 22:42
Tina,
Manfred did put on a show on Sunday. We had the Hornet make three passes. It is
a beautiful thing to see. The piolt made these very slow passes. It was really
something. I think I can turn off just about any sound. I can isolate sounds most
of the time. You know, hear what I want to hear. I think it is a skill that you
get from growing up in a large family with a lot of loud people. There was also
lots of music in my home. I had to learn to tune out extra noise.
Mary,
I hope that your headaches go away. I know that when I was preggers I got some
pretty nasty pounders. Most of the time I don't get pain with migrains (spelling)?
When I'm preggers I get the pain. Isn't that weird? I wonder why that is. I don't
really have to worry about it any more (grins). I don't really plan to carry another
child. Then again you never know...
Take care all.
Rachel 8-21-2002 22:20
Hi all!
Jerry, congratulations on getting published!
Mary, contratulations on getting pregnant!
For everyone else, and the world, here's a hat full of good vibes ///\\\///\\\///\\\///\\\
And Mel, if you get a chance to look in here, I got your letter/crit. Thanks!
Except I'll have to send you my proper snail mail address. That one went to the
place I used to work; I used their mail account to send you the hardcopy of shadow
since they had business mail rates. E-mail me when you get back on line. As for
your crit, I'm thinking much about it. Some very sound observations. Thank you.
Rachel, you can turn off the sound of an F117 screaming overhead? Very cool skill
to have. Did the B117 stealth bomber come by on Sunday? It was freaky cool. And
what about Manfred in his sailplane? I love Manfred, but he didn't perform on
Saturday.
Blue skies!
Tina 8-21-2002 22:14
MARY -- I've heard lots of reasons why people have been absent from the
notebook, but this is the best yet! :-)
Congratulations!
howrad 8-21-2002 21:51
MARY!!!
That is fantastic news. I am so happy for you (big hugs). Be sure to let us know
when your due date is.
Take care you.
Rachel 8-21-2002 20:58
Hi Guys!!!
I have been trying to catch up on the posts, but it is taking me a while, I have
been suffering some of the worst headaches of my life the last few days. You know,
the ones that make you worry if something isn't BAD wrong with your brains. I
lose all my peripheral vision and get white spots in my field of vision. Freaky.
There is a bit of news I wanted to share with you though! I am expecting a baby!
No clue when I am due, but I will hopefully find that out Friday after my ultra-sound,
so I will keep you posted. This is really exciting and totally unexpected.
Gotta run for now, but will be back soon.
SHORTIE NIGHT THEME: Malice
Mary 8-21-2002 19:10
MARK -- thanks for the pointer! That is excellent! Does that site
post that level of poetry all the time?
howard 8-20-2002 23:20
I know after a sunny post like that you'll be kind of wondering a little
at this post, it's going to be a little more... oh how do I put it, mellow? This
is a poem I wrote, my sister says it's touching but what do sisters know? Just
kidding. She's actually my critic, (in more ways than just writing). Just to explain
it a little bit before I post it: it's a poem about a widow who is trying to get
over the fact that her husband has died. She is still standing by his gravestone
and in her mind she is hearing the last word her husband whispered to her. She
answers that word with her own despairing thoughts.
Thoughts of a widow
(whispered) Goodbye...
Why?...
Why must you leave me?
() Goodbye...
No...
Please do not leave me!
() Goodbye...
Please...
I'm begging you to stay.
() Goodbye...
You can't...
I need you to be strong, to stay.
() Goodbye...
Must I...?
Must I stay silent as you're leaving me?
() Goodbye...
No...
My head realizes that you must go. It is only my stubborn heart that is still
resisting the fact that you have already said goodbye.
() Goodbye...
Pleas...darling...
Never, never again will I gaze upon your beauty, your face. Let me look at you
so that I may always know your wonderful features, every laughter line, all the
weaknesses and strengths of you, so that when you are gone forever from my sight,
I will still have your imagin inside my heart.
() Goodbye...
So...
So this is heartache... this is what the heartbroken feel... the aching for you
when I know that I may no longer have you, touch you, see you, know you, feel
you... this is lonliness of the greatest degree known to the human race.
() Goodbye...
Why?
Why must you go and leave me in this broken and perlious world? You loved me when
no one else would. You picked me up when I had fallen. You healed me when you
saw my infliction. You comforted me when I sobbed hopelessly and helplessly for
a release of the anguish I felt...
() Goodbye...
Don't...
Don't leave me. I've no one else left. Who will care for me when I am sick? Who
will I care for when they are ill? I have no one and no one will have me. My heart
is shattered and the tiny pieces of which si left is enough to cause a pain that
overwhelmes me even as I look at you.
() Goodbye...
No...
Please...my sorrow is caused solely by the knowledge that I will never again hear
my name uttered from your sweet lips, never again will I be able to look into
your beautiful eyes and see the love that is hidden and unhidden behind their
brillance. My heart aches jsut to hear one reasurring word from your lips.
() Goodbye...
Why...?
My heart is broken into pieces so small that they are unconcievable to the naked
eye. The only way to see my shattered soul is by looking into my eyes and seeing
the sorrow that I was unable to hide there. Hope is far away and not within a
year's throw. Hope is not the word that inspires the thought of peace and a sense
that there is still a future, a tomorrow.
() Goodbye...
Why?
My heart is like a plant withdrawn from the sunlight that is needed for survival.
My heart beats in expectation of you walking through the door and my head drops
in despair and sorrow when you weren't there.
() Goodbye...
How...?
You were my light, my hope, my life. You held the threads of my heart together
as a masterweaver threads together a beautiful tapestry. You made my life be filled
with joy and laughter, all of which is now forgotten. You are telling me that
I must leave you, that I must say goodbye. All I want to do is stay by your gravestone
and pray that I am living in a nightmare and that when I wake up you image will
be there, assuring me that everything will be all right. I miss you as I have
missed no one and nothing else before in my life. To say that I must bid you farewell
is to say that I msut say goodbye to life itself.
() Goodbye...
No...and yes.
Yes, I must say goodbye, the one word that might kill me. But even my death is
better then the dreary world of which my life has become. You are gone and no
wishing in the world will bring you back to me, even though I wish for it with
all the broken pieces of my heart. My soul yearns for you as a crop yearns for
water after a drought. Still there is no hope only a conscienceness that urge
me to keep moving through this mediocre life of which this life has become. There
is thawt urgency that I must survive, must keep going even though the hope has
left me and the joy is gone. It has come down to this. I shall always be yours;
forever more.
Goodbye.
() Goodbye...
Well that's it and my parents are shoving me off the computer.
Till Niagara Falls!
Elaine 8-20-2002 23:15
Whew! Link below to a knockyersocksoff poem.
JERRY !! CONGRATS !!
Mark kiss
8-20-2002 23:12
CONGRATS to you JERRY!! I just can't wait for the day that i'll be published.
By the way with this talk of celebrations, I have my driver's liscense!!!! WHEW!
I thought I was going to have to ride the bus to school every morning and afternoon
to school. Talking about frost, it feels like we're going to get snow any day
now. Just feels like it, the weather forcaster's didn't say anything about it
(yet) here in Fridgeria. I want to thank Heather, Jon, Carol (twice) and Randall
again. Thank you, there was a lot of well timed and well thought advice of which
I needed desperately. It has helped so the advice wasn't misplaced. "All the world's
a stage" but all the sight's a story. Well, see ya all in an updraft...(of snow)
Till Niagara Falls!
Elaine 8-20-2002 22:41
Carol - all the editor told me in the email was that she had selected my
story for the next issue, I see it's published every other month, and it appears
that the next issue will be Sept. Oct. so I assume it should be up in a few weeks.
I'll let you know here when it happens, as I assure you I shall be checking to
see when it's there daily.
Interesting, the news just reported that the US has had troops in Iraq now for
the past 8 months on recon missions, and search and destroy missions. They also
tell us that there are terrorists of the El Quida branch who are in Iraq and that
they are using Sadam's labs to produce their weapons of terror.
It is on FOX so I tend to believe them. Also good news, the Amber Alert has saved
another child in California today. It's rare that I say Attaboy to the press,
but ATTABOY guys actually doing something right with all the reporting of missing
children. It's about time they drop all the political sex crap and get on with
true news, where they can be some help.
Now if they just keep it up...
Thanks everyone for the good words.
Write ON!
Oh I might explain, I used to be known (in college at least) as the "greetings
and salutations" guy, however when I came to this notebook TOM (The Old Man) used
something close to that, so I never used it, seizing instead on Write ON!
Or was it Goodweed? Could have been, haven't seen either of them around for quite
some time. Wonder how their doing, and what about SKS Perry?
Jerry 8-20-2002 22:18
Umm, just a question, where did workbook go and is it coming back?
Laura 8-20-2002 22:10
No, I'm not dead and I will be putting up something soon, I have an idea
I'm hashing out and I need some help on it.
Laura
Laura 8-20-2002 22:09
Hi All :)
Congratulations Jerry!!! That's wonderful news. Now do let us know exactly when
your story will be put up and ready to read. I'm looking forward to seeing it
as I entered this website after the Workbook disappeared. :)
I keep wondering how to comment on this recent discussion. Wondering just what
my feelings, thoughts and ideas are. Truthfully, they are too mixed up to make
any coherence from. One thing that caught my attention though was how hard it
is to really know the mind of some of these, shall we say, oddities? My thoughts
went immediately to this past spring when my undiagnosed lupus was acting up.
I recall how scared I was of the temper I was experiencing. I do occasionally
get upset, even burning mad, at things. But this was so different. It was like
there was a cold steel bar running throughout my body where the blood and bones
should be. I could feel that coldness in the back of my throat. Hubby could have
said "I love you" and I would have wanted to strangle him. It was truly the oddest
and most terrifying thing I've every experienced. It was only knowing that this
was abnormal to my personality and my faith that kept me from acting on this oddity.
Now that I know the cause of it, I will be even better able to handle it if it
occurs again. But it does make me wonder .... and now I do have an experience,
complete with sensations, to use for my villians. I know, none of this info helps
to solve the problems of our world. Just a stray thought that found its way onto
the page.
Carol 8-20-2002 14:36
EDDIE -- I agree wholeheartedly that something needs to be done. We've held
up our precious freedom of speech (and it is indeed precious) until it's become
a perverse god -- controlling and manipulating our society until we have difficulty
telling right from wrong.
I believe we're beginning to harvest the fruits of the "good/evil/truth is whatever
you believe it to be" philosophy. We as a society have denied the idea of an absolute
standard (there's that word again -- maybe we're ready for it now?), until now
we're becoming sickened by the evil that we've allowed to expand beyond the bounds
of all that's decent.
Our president was derided when he used the "old-fashioned" term "evil-doers" to
describe the Taliban, the Al Quaida terrorists, and those who support them. I
think he was right on the money -- and the term ought to be expanded to include
these monsters who prey on the innocent. We need to recognise that there is indeed
evil in this world, and it is not merely a concept, but an active force that seeks
to control, overthrow, and destroy all that is good.
We've listened too long to our shrinks, analysts, and crackpot psychologists who
try to explain these aberrations away by saying that "The poor murderer, rapist,
abuser, molester, thief, cheater, adulterer, whatever, is himslf a victim, and
to him these actions are only a backlash against the society that has wronged
him." These so-called doctors are suffering from the same delusions as their patients
-- how can we expect a cure from them?
I'm currently doing some research, and re-reading a book called Practical Christian
Theology, written by Dr. Floyd Barackman, an acquaintance of mine. It covers
the major doctrines of the Christian church. I'm into the section on Hamartiology
-- the doctrine of sin. That's another old fashioned word/concept that the learned
doctors decry. It's awfully hard to read it without mentally seeing a direct correlation
with the world around us.
No, it's impossible.
howard 8-20-2002 13:39
Well done Jerry.
It just had to come around some time soon.
<<<<<>>>>>
Teek,
It's more than just knowing the village where the girls lived. I have a stronger
connection. More info later, if and when the trial develops. But really, even
if it wasn't I would still feel the way I do. It is the culmination of a number
of these recent events that move me. And this:
A few weeks ago I was looking for some software on the net and I was directed
to a site (by a search engine) that had no relevence to my search. It turned out
to be a 'violent sex' 'rape' type site. I thought I could look at this site in
an objective way, to 'investigate' what is really out there. I couldn't! The depraved
minds of some people out there defy description. I wont describe some of what
I saw there before I had to close it down. I almost gave up on the internet. Then
I remembered this site and knew that it would be letting the monsters rule my
life. I am still here but I have been affected by what I saw and I am now re-considering
my views on internet regulation.
ISP's have a huge responsibility which they are ignoring. If they don't do something
now then legislation will come and it will be their own fault for not acting.
I know that there are countries around the world which will not comply and I have
heard all of the arguments about the dificulties of policing the net but - "A
journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step".
Somehow we have to get to grips with this problem.
Ed
Eddie 8-20-2002 8:52
JERRY -- Congrats! That was a good story!
Drawing and quartering would be appropriate, but I can think of a five
way split that would be even moreso!
howrad 8-20-2002 5:56
JERRY: WHOOOO HOOOOOOOOO TO YOU!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!
BTW: About the turning into a cold blooded killer thing, I didn't mean that to
come out judgmentally, it was just an observation from your post. I was shaving
my legs and the blade fell off the razor for the 5th time, and I was about ready
to commit murder myself, though for less noble reasons.
Like I said, as writers we are able to have varying perspectives on life, the
earlier one was my removed, clinical observation. I pray to God that I may never
have a first hand account and am only left with my imagination as to how I would
deal and feel with such a situation.
The reason I had to come back and say this was because I was putting my shoes
on my son, and he looked at me with those huge child's eye's and said, "I love
you, Mummy." And I thought of the conversation we're having here, and I wondered
how much hate a person must have within them to do some of the things they do.
CONGRATS AGAIN JERRY!!! I am soooo happy for you. Now haven't I been telling you
for ages??
Teekay 8-20-2002 3:29
RANDALL
Evening all ...
On human predatory monsters ... They have always been with us. From time before
time. They will always be with us. Time after time. Humans, so much responsible
for all that is good in the world carry an equal amount of related human garbage
as well. We cannot possible understand these child rapists and murderers, because
we, the good folk, cannot relate to them. Most of us are not predators who prey
on young and innocent. Their inner motives and horrific actions are as remote
as the back side of the moon to us. You can study them till hell freezes over
and still not answer the simplest question ... WHY? In fact there is no answer
other than they are a part of the human population and in all probability, sadly,
will never be weeded out.
If this seems to be simple reasoning, it is. There has always been a percentage
of human monsters within the general population. It is just that as populations
increase world wide so do human predators with perceptions of reality beyond our
understanding. (9/11 can fall within this category) Add to the expanding growth
of human predators ... an active media...and you have the situations that are
developing today. Prevention is the only answer and that will be darn hard to
achieve. Evil evokes at will, while reaction is after the fact.
How would I do it?
Well, most of these guys have police records regarding child molestation. If within
the human population of adult predator and child prey lie percentages of evil
intent, then we must increase the odds in our favor. It is folly to allow ANYONE
with even one known incident of child molestation to go unrecorded within any
population. To that respect we must adopt a well known political scheme to achieve
this goal. Best used in the Anita Hill hearings many years ago when she accused
a supreme court appointee of sexual misconduct. "The seriousness of the charge..."
was valid then and IS still a focus of American politics. Note there may be no
facts, no collaboration of the charge, no witnesses, but ... "The seriousness
of the charge warrants further investigation." Any investigation, however slim,
of the charge of child molestation for a person could be prolonged and prolonged
and prolonged.
True, this may violate the "due process" statute to some extent...but then how
valuable is the life of a 10 year old girl? Reports of missing children in America
are 2,000 a day. We're losing to many of our personal freedoms Randall! Thats
right! Now it's time to make the evil doers lose theirs.
Randall
Randall 8-20-2002 0:21
Jerry,
CONGRATS! That is great (big smiles to you).
Rachel 8-20-2002 0:04
Teekay - so good to see you back again, I've missed your posts. Yes, I'm
ready to turn into a cold blooded killer to extract retribution. Please not though,
that this killing should be done publicly, televised on all channels, on prime
time so those who think to harm another will think maybe twice before doing so.
It is right for society to kill those who kill, and anyone who wants to throw
religion at me to show it isn't have read only those parts of the bible that they
wish to honor.
At any rate on a totally different subject:
I AM BEING PUBLISHED!! Well it's just in an ezine but published none-the-less.
http://www.wilmingtonblues.com/
is putting my Tiger Piss story in their next issue, just got an email from the
editor letting me know the same and confirming that I want it published.
Teekay - it's one of the ezine's you pointed me to several weeks ago, I just dug
out one of my stories from Americo's project on food, oh so many months (years?)
ago, way back when we had a WORKBOOK here to post such things.
I am happy about that.
And thank you Teekay!
Oh and by the way, I was exaggerating a bit when I called for drawing and quartering,
in truth, I would be happy to see them get the needle.
I am beginning to change my views on the death penalty, maybe it's age, maybe
the exposure to you folks, probably the result of Illinois experience where 13
men who were on death row were found to be innocent, thanks to a law school project
that went out and found the real killers in each case. If one state can make so
many mistakes, then perhaps we should be a bit less blood thirsty, and way more
careful. From what I've heard the conviction of those men can be attributed to
some police misdeed, some prosecutor misdeed, and lots of abuse of the prison
informants.
At any rate, I am beginning to doubt the use of the death penalty, not because
I think it murder, no, I think it a punishment that should be dealt out to one
who will kill another. But because it is so final, once a guy's dead it's hard
to bring him back and say "sorry bout that."
Anyhow must be off, Law and Order is on for the fifth time tonight, think I'll
watch it.
Jerry 8-19-2002 23:47
Hi Tina,
Yes, I did get to the airshow. We were there on Sunday. It was pretty cool. My
kids were blown away by the size of some of the craft that they saw. The airshow
worked its usual magic on me. That is to say that around half way through I did
the lay back, look up and stop hearing the sound of them. When I get tired I tend
to turn off what it is that is keeping me awake (grins and laughter). It is really
something to look up at the show and hear nothing at all. Talk about selective
hearing. Maybe I just decide it has been to loud for too long. I used to live
near train tracks. It got to the piont where I didn't even hear them any more.
I had to be very careful when I would cross the tracks. I would look with great
caution up and down. I had times when the trains were very close. I think they
way I decide to hear things is a little odd. I am pleased to hear that you enjoyed
your stay in the lowermainland. It is a pretty awsome place to live (big wide
smiles). When it socks in for the winter with rain, rain and some rain, then I
will dream of living in your neck of the woods. I’ll sit back and think about
powder snow and wish for something different. I’m glad the writing bug has taken
a chomp out of you (winks). Happy writing/editing to you.
Rachel 8-19-2002 22:54
Hi all;
EDDIE: I agree, Grandparents ought to play a big part in the life of their Grandchild,
assuming they're normal (generous boundaries) that is.
((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))) to you too.
RHODA and JACK:
There's a guy who has written 3 books about what happened to him, he was rated
the third most abused child in America (that survived), but somehow he managed
to overcome his past and to get on with his life productively.
I imagine that would be an incredibly difficult thing to do, easier to bury the
soul and live by the flesh, which is what I think a lot of people who have had
really brutal pasts might do.
I mean, how hard is it for someone to give up cigarettes? Gambling?
Imagine as an abused child, and I'm not talking the mild stuff here, not the normal
everyday not listening to your kids when they talk to you, not spending quality
time with them, not teaching them values, not teaching them to be a well rounded
compassionate human being, nor the next step down, shouting and slapping and telling
your kids they're good for nothing.
I mean the big stuff, imagine trying to throw off a whole perspective of yourself
as shallow and worthless, Imagine having spent a childhood devoid of love, and
somewhere warm to turn? Imagine a childhood where those who ought to have loved
you best were those who abused and hurt you, how do you, after years of being
told you were nothing, convince yourself that life is valuable? How do you learn
to respect yourself and others, how do you come to believe that life is worth
living, and that there is a God?
Sure, it's happened, there are people who have overcome amazing odds to come out
of the dark, but for everyone that has, there are so very many more that haven't.
The human psyche is a delicate thing take EDDIE for instance, comes across as
a normal decent human being,with not too much, if any of a terrible past, and
because he knows the village where the two girls came from, is strongly questioning
God's motives, maybe even existence.
JERRY also is ready to turn into a blood thirsty murderer, for the sake of retribution.
RHODA:
By this:
There will come a day when there is no more death, no more crime, no more evil.
Jesus will return and he will reign.
What does that mean? That heaven will be on earth?
Be well all.
Teekay 8-19-2002 21:15
Howard,
Right on the button!
As parents and grandparents we have a responsibility to see to it that our young
are given decent values and standards to live by.
I think I posted some time back about the value of grandparents in society but
I don't remember getting a response. It is an important role which MUST be fulfilled.
Ed
Eddie 8-19-2002 19:37
EDDIE -- you're right -- if only people could be basically good, and considerate
of others, this would be a much better world to live in. Unfortunately they're
not.
Like this afternoon, for instance. There is a stretch of country road near here
that's posted 20 mph through a village, next to a playground/swimming pool where
there are lots of kids coming and going. The road is narrow, with bushes and trees
on both sides. I've seen kids dart out into the road suddenly, as if from nowhere.
This afternoon I was driving through the village, and I slowed to 20 as I usually
do. A woman behind me had been tailgating me for some distance (I try to obey
the speed limit, or just over it). She blew her horn, impatient to get to wherever
she was going. As we passed the last 20 MPH sign I pointed at it, and held up
two fingers, indicating the speed limit -- 20. She promptly signalled back that
she thought she was entitled to go at least one mile an hour faster! And this
in front of two kids in her van who were in kiddie seats, as well as a couple
older children. Now what kind of a lesson did those kids learn from their mom?
howard 8-19-2002 16:18
Hi everyone ~ It feels very odd to be interrupting the current sombre mood
on the NB to announce my short leave of vacationing absence; however, I won't
be here tomorrow to leave this post!
I am taking along a good many of the P* stories to the cottage, and will be editing
a pile of them at leisure.
Have a great week, everyone, and hopefully the dark clouds on the horizon will
bring only rain; not sorrow as well.
Heather Hemlock Bags
8-19-2002 14:37
Howard,
I understand that view, hence my quick re-post to Rhoda. I do accept (It should
be obvious from my stated viepoint) that a lawless society, by this I mean a society
that has no formal constitutional laws not an out of control society, can be a
good society if everybody remains basicaly decent and considerate to others. However,
my experience of the religious view of 'conscience remains the same. I was raised
catholic and at one time served on the alter as an alter boy. My memories of that
time are filled with the constant reminders and warnings of the fires of hell
and purgatory for transgressions of the faith. This is indeed the instillment
of the fear of punishment for sins by others, be it peers or diety. So my observation
still stands (In a very simplistic manner I know)
I'm sure that everybody who wishes will be able to quote some passage from the
bible which will clarify or even disprove this. My concern though, is for the
here and now. There has to be a response to this increasing evil and it has to
come from the good, no matter how we define the reasons for 'being good'
Not a good response I know, but I have one of those 'innocents?' on my knee and
she insists on asking just what EVERY bit of equipment in this office does and
she wants to know NOW!
Later
Eddie 8-19-2002 14:18
EDDIE -- The conscience is not a thing regulated by the fear of retribution
from other people. The Christian view of the conscience is that it is an innate
understanding of what is right or wrong by God's standard.
The Bible describes those who "do not have the law, but by nature do the things
contained in the law...which shows the work of the law written in their hearts,
their conscience also bearing witness..." (Romans 2). In other words everyone
knows down inside what is right and what is wrong -- even to the extent that that
innate knowledge is compared with the knowledge of the law (what we know as the
ten commandments)(), and that knowledge is placed there by the Creator.
It further says that this conscience is not indestructible, but can be overridden
by the will (1 Timothy 4:2) and made of no effect. That is what Rhoda described,
and what God calls "inexcusable".
howard 8-19-2002 13:18
Rhoda,
Reading my last post back after posting it, it may look as though I was answering
you personally and it read somewhat harshly. That was not my intention. In better
times I may have found a less blunt way of explaining myself. I know that you
are a deeply devout christian and a good person. I did not mean to belittle your
concept of conscience. We live according to the rules which we set ourselves but
the results are generally the same; We become decent human beings.
((Hugs))
Ed
Eddie 8-19-2002 12:00
Rhoda,
Yes I do grieve. I grieve for the state of mankind too.
Just to pick up on something in your post (something which I have heard or read
before)
"throw off the shackles on conscience and go where our inclinations would take
us.. etc."
This often taken position has never sat well in my mind, I have tried to reason
the intellect behind it and have failed every time. Here is my take on it:
I do not need a 'conscience' to live my life in a caring and thoughtful way. This
implies that I am 'good' only because I fear the retribution of my fellow beings
if I 'stray' from the path of decency and trust. This implies that I live a decent
life only because I wish not to bear the consequences of transgression. If that
was the only reason for me to live as society wants me to then I would be able
to confidently weigh up the pros and cons of a given situation and make a decision
about how I want to behave.
Jerry said that people kill or commit other henious crimes because they want to.
The same goes for the opposite; I do not want to be a cruel B***tard! I do not
want to steal from anybody and I certainly have no wish to harm the innocent.
I do not need a 'conscience'to tell me how to live my life. I do not say this
lightly, I have thought it through in a philisophical manner. I have looked at
it from every angle.
I am not naive however, and I do know that some will attempt to hurt me or cheat
me. I have seen death and horrific injury, I know how it can get. All life is
to be treasured and protected as far as we can possibly help it. Sometimes we
make mistakes or fall down on the job, but we learn from these mistakes.
The preponderence of monsters in this world is a frightening development which
needs careful consideration and effective management. Decent human beings will
only take so much evil. They will act. It is engrained on our Psyche, just remember
every story you ever read as a child, every drama or film that you watch now.
In the end a HERO comes to save the day. The hero is a metaphor. The true hero
is human decency. We have to believe this or we might as well give up now.
Sorry to take up so much space.
Ed
Eddie 8-19-2002 11:52
EDDIE,
It is horrible, and I grieve with you as I do grieve about the children who have
been taken here in the United States as late. And yes, I do believe it is getting
worse.
JACK,
Your explanation sounds so logical except it doesn't account for the fact that
each person has a soul and a spiritual dimmension that transcends genetics, environment
and gives each person a decision how they are going to live their lives. There
are exceptions such as people who are dealing with a mental illness, but biochemistry,
medical condition and environment will never explain everything.
There is evil in this world. Every one of us flirts with it in some form or another
because we have something in us that is flawed. Christians call it "sin," a very
old-fashioned word. Everyone also has a sense of right and wrong, a conscience,
and that keeps most of us in check and helps foster the better parts of our nature
like love, hope, generousity, compassion, etc. But what if conscience is squelched
and squelched at such a young age that it never fully develops?
Is there anyone here reading this post who hasn't had a thought or notion they
are soon after ashamed of? Do we have a flaw such as a bad temper maybe, or a
tendency to drink too much, or a tendency to be selfish at times? I would bet
that we all do. The difference is that we know some of these things are wrong
and we temper them. I don't think any of us would hurt an innocent young child,
but were we throw off the shackles on conscience and go where our inclinations
would take us and lose all fear of the law and of God, it might be shocking to
most of us to what depths of depravity we might sink to after five, ten years
or more of living this way. What if there were no loved ones or no law either
to curb all this? It would be hell on earth if enough of us were in this situation.
Well, there are people who for one reason or another make that decision. Some
of these folks might do nothing worse than rob a few banks, embezzle from their
workplace, run a house of prostitution, sell drugs on a street corner, etc., but
there are a significant amount of them who will murder innocents.
I think the Bible give the best insight into the heart of man. I have found it
consistent with what I have observed in 42 years of life. The good news is that
one day things will be different. There will come a day when there is no more
death, no more crime, no more evil. Jesus will return and he will reign. I know
that is a hard thing for intelligent, modern people to believe, but I'll take
it to the bank. Until that day, we just must work within our ability to examine
our own hearts and make our lives something of worth. We take care of our families,
friends and our neighbors who need a hand. We do what we can do to make our community
better and safer.
Rhoda 8-19-2002 11:14
I know the press, the intelligentie, the shrinks, the Doctors, the social
workers, and all the other elite's have theories about how monsters become monsters.
Many say that it is due to abuse as children, many claim it's because the monster
grew up deprived and poor, they say that the monsters grew up in homes that were
one parent homes, or that the monsters parents were alcoholics, drug abusers,
or trailer house trash.
Yet with all this information that they postulate, how come the vast majority
of those who grew up in abusive homes, who's parents were alcoholics, drug abusers,
who were raped and beaten when children, who were trailer house trash grow up
to be good productive citizens who through their own efforts drug themselves up
from the gutter and made something of their lives.
I used to listen to all this bs about the poor abused kids who had no choice but
to be criminals, until I began work in law enforcement.
Then I became very aware that it was all a bushel of bull shit. Monsters become
monsters because the want too. It's just that simple. It's the same with criminals,
they turn to crime because THEY WANT TO!
Oh I'm sure they didn't start out saying "I want to kill little girls!" No it
started out with "I want that toy!" and they stole that toy. Seeing how easy that
was, they continued with larger and greater thefts, just a matter of degree until
they felt they could get away with anything.
Much the same with mass killers, who began by cutting up live animals, and went
on to bigger animals until they came to people.
I could be wrong, but that's the way I see it.
Jerry 8-19-2002 11:05
p.p.s
Again, I will be archiving in the next day or so. In part that is to make sure
the Notebook does not grow totally out of size as I head off to the World Science
Fiction Convention in San Jose. I will also after it is over be off to do some
diving at Los Lobos and on the Monterey Express.
Jack Beslanwitch World Science Fiction Convention
8-19-2002 4:38
Eddie and Jerry: Let me expand slightly on what I stated before. In part
this could be a developmental outcome due to untreated abuse at an early age or
outright abuse to the point that a conscience never developed at a critical juncture
in the developmental process. That and/or genetic components that allow for certain
environmental pressures to express themselves in certain types of ways. This is
not to exonerate the monstrous actions you allude to and I will recuse myself
from the death penalty discussion since my own personal and religious beliefs
are opposed to it, but I am sorely tempted in situations such as you describe
to step away from principle. Serial killers, aggressive pedophiles and similar
ilk, are individuals that we should deal with, yes, but also attempt to learn
from as best we can to at least attempt to preclude it from happening again. What
truly results in a monster is a question open for exploration and as writers this
perhaps is a useful if unfortunate thing. It allows us to take our own tact on
how we create a monster. My previous allusion to Hannibal Lector is replete in
the three books with the motivations that ultimately resulted in the monster he
became.
Point of fact, that might be an interested discussion in terms of creating the
central antagonist in a story line. How do you create a monster. One of the assignments
at a Clarion West in the past that I heard of was to come to class and create
the worst most revolting and evil villain/monster that you can create. Then when
everybody arrived with their take on this, the writer instructor told the class
now make them sympathetic.
My usual approach or my hoped for approach is to mine the angst and anger and
anguish that comes of such monstrous circumstances to motivate the words and the
muse to make me put words on screen. This sidesteps entirely the specifics of
the monstrous actions done in the last several days, but I can well understand
the gut level desire to seek vengeance and justice in circumstances such as this.

Jack Beslanwitch 8-19-2002 1:04
Eddie - I know what your feeling right now. Can't say that I can explain
a thing about how people do such things, they just do.
I fear that we are not half so civilized as we think we are. It's just that most
of us control our hate and anger better then those who kill.
Those who kill kids though they are a different breed all together, they should
die the same way they kill their victims, or worse. There is no fitting punishment
for such animals, but as a civilized society we try to lock them away for awhile
then tell ourselves that we have rehabed them then turn them loose on an unsuspecting
society again.
We are facing 19th century animals and delving out 21st century punishments. Perhaps
we should go back to death by the lash, or maybe drawing and quartering, but I
doubt that it would help.
Most of these animals think they will not be caught, and know that if they are
the punishment will be neither swift no fitting.
Yes, I think public drawing and quartering, that may be the answer, at least the
one who is drawn and quartered will never hurt another child.
Jerry 8-19-2002 0:11
Jack,
You postulate that our intellect outstrips our genetic bent by at least a couple
of hundred years.
God help us then!
The right way to live seems so easy to me. Why then is it so confusing to such
a significant number of human beings.
My heart is broken right now. I just can't bring myself to believe that this is
some genetic throwback behaviour which was at one time partly acceptable.
These animals should be removed from the face of the earth. It is so simple. It
is not, and can never be, right to inflict this sort of pain onto the world.
(Cherish the children, for they are the future.)
Where was God when these innocents were so cruelly taken and killed.
Every day we find more reason to suspect that God has turned his back on our world.
(This from a person who has never been over religeous.)
If it is within our power as writers then we must try to turn the tide and make
this a better world.
Sorry for the rant everybody. I just can't accept that any human being could do
this thing.
Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.
Ed
Eddie 8-18-2002 22:18
p.s. I noticed that we care starting to get large. Some time in the next
week I will archive. Also, I have a video up on my underwater video site of a
harbor seal that scoped us out recently as well as cloud sponges and a wolf eel.
Take care everyone.
Videos
8-18-2002 21:41
Eddie: As much as this sad and twisted event comes to assault us and bewilder
us about the circumstances that would spawn such monsters, it is possibly good
to remember that this is not new, just better reported and better pursued by the
police in question. Set aside current depravities such as Ruanda and Cambodia
and set back a century and think about the actions of the white population towards
the Indians and the blacks. The etiology and causation of such madness, and it
is madness, can be cultural, biochemical, genetic and more. The one lesson I think
is important to bear in mind about all of this is that in the last fifty years
we have become more and more knowledgable about how much nature there is to such
homicidal rages and pedophilic depravities rather than nurture. The fact that
we understand ourselves better now than a century ago and perhaps consider what
was the status quo then as monstrous now perhaps says we are at least started
to be pointed in the right direction. As writers and creative individuals who
are prone to explore the nature of the human psyche we need to step back and not
necessarily understand them, but at least be able to recognize what makes them
tick. One of the more chilling books I read in science fiction was an account
of an alternate history in which the defeated tories and confederates went to
South Africa. The first and second books were told in major chunks from the perspective
of the slave holding monsters and you found yourself drawn in deeper and deeper
into their psyche until you snapped back and looked on in horror. It is this ability
to draw the reader into the mindset of the monster that can create some quite
compelling pieces of fiction. Another example that comes to mind is the trilogy
of Hannible Lector, including Red Dragon, Silence of the Lambs and Hannible. We
may not like the real world outcome of these sick and twisted actions, but we
can use them as inspiration for our writing endeavors. It does not change that
we do not have Genghis Khan or Torquemada living today, because point of fact
that are alive and well, just, hopefully, not with enough power to perpetrate
actions on the scale such individuals have done in the past. That beggars the
question as to whether it will happen again. The answer is likely yes. Hitler
and Pol Pot and other of their stripe are not that far away. They are still trying
to figure out how to adjudicate the individuals that comitted mass murder in Ruwanda.
The best we can hope for is that we can mine the many faceted and very flawed
diamond that is the human condition for some meaning that we can write about.
My 2 cents worth.

Jack Beslanwitch 8-18-2002 21:39
It is a sad day for the world.
This country has been glued to the news channels for the past two weeks.
Yesterday the bodies of ten year old Holly Wells and her best friend Jessica Chapman
(Also ten years old) were found in a wood near to their home village.
I know the area well as it was badly hit by the foot and mouth outbreak last year.
I spent some time in the Village.
The whole thing begs the obvious question. What the hell is going wrong with the
World?
How do we breed these strange creatures that prey on the future of our society?
I gave up trying to get inside the criminal mind a long time ago, it was just
too painful. If I think too deeply about it I may decide that I no longer wish
to live in such a world.
Where do we turn now for directions?
Do we bring back capital punishment?
That was my gut response this morning.
I really don't know any more.
F***ing BASTARDS!!!
Sorry for my bad mouthing but it berst describes my anquish.
Later,
Ed
Eddie Simply Writing
8-18-2002 18:50
JERRY -- Please understand that I'm not picking on you, or poking fun, but
"duel control on the electric blanket" does provoke some hilarious images! :-)
howrad 8-18-2002 9:12
Send a bit of that hot and muggy our way, the weatherman used the "F" word
in the forecast tonight, no he said FROST!
Way too early for that, heck the garden isn't even close to producing tomatoes
as of yet, and that's all that grew in this dry HOT arid summer. Now winter is
creeping in, so very early. The past few days have been cold, in fact I put an
extra blanket on my side of the bed last night and it felt very good. The wife
would like to sleep with the windows open in the winter should I let her, she
so loves her cold for sleeping. That's why I have a duel control on the electric
blanket in winter, but it's too early for that too.
They say it may again get up in the 80's but then again, it may not.
Yesterday was so windy that more branches fell, gusts were over 70MPH again, that
was what brought the cold spell, or so the weatherman said.
Oh well life goes on, and we should be writing about it shouldn't we?
Write ON!
Jerry 8-18-2002 0:18
It rained here today. Now it's hot and steamy.
G'nite!
howard 8-17-2002 22:17
RANDALL -- A pool of crude that's just a headache! That IS rich!
When I was about 8 years old, we were all coming home from a day at the lake.
As we approached Lockport city limit, we passed Reid's Hot Dog stand. It was mobbed.
My mother said, "He has a gold mine there." I stared at that stand and the people
around it until it went out of view.
"Mom. If he has a gold mine, why does he keep selling hot dogs?"
Mark 8-16-2002 13:45
Want to end the drought??
Women's naked farming ritual brings rain
August 16 2002
Some 200 women in Nepal who ploughed their fields naked in a desperate attempt
to bring rain to their drought-stricken region were rewarded as the monsoon began
shortly afterwards, a report said yesterday.
The women had last week locked their husbands inside their houses and then stripped
off to till their fields at midnight in a bid to appease the Hindu god of rain,
Indra.
The superstitious women were trying to bring showers to the far western Banke
district, where the monsoon had failed to materialise and farmers had been unable
to plant rice.
Naked farming was not the only ritual performed by the locals, they also "married"
male and female frogs and staged naked dances - all thought to provoke divine
intervention to end dry spells.
Days after the naked ploughing, it began raining in western parts of the country
and it seemed the rain god Indra was finally appeased, the Nepali-language daily,
Nepal Samacharpatra said.
Local official Rajesh Kumar Mahato from the neighbouring Dhangadhi district told
the newspaper some places in the region had 197mm of rainfall at the weekend.
The ritual had worked so well that excessive rainfall caused roads to become flooded.
Meteorology Department officials forecast the rain would continue for a few more
days, the newspaper said.
Some 422 people have died in Nepal from flooding and landslides during this monsoon
season, according to the International Federation of Red Cross and Red Crescent
Societies.
AFP
Jerry 8-16-2002 11:28
Hoo! I've just come in from the garden, and it was sooo hot and dry out
there...
How hot was it ?
Well, when I finally worked up enough moisture to spit, I was immediately attacked
by three beets and a thirsty turnip! That's dry. They get mean when they
get dehydrated.
Picked a bucket full of cucumbers for pickles though, and enough green and yellow
beans to can a dozen or 15 pints. I always get to thinking about Greg Brown's
song about this time of year. One of the best lines I ever heard was his "...and
Gramma puts summer in a jar..." from that song.
It's supposed to rain this afternoon and tonight. I hope it does.
howrad 8-16-2002 11:21
As has been suggested right here in the notebook, I've spent this evening
browsing news from around the world, including online papers from England, Germany,
Ireland, Luxembourg, Russia, Malta and a few others who's names escape me at the
moment. There was this nice page at the BBC world news that gives links to other
news services, that's where I found the papers.
At any rate, from these papers I get the impression that first off, most of the
world is simply too busy with their own worries to care much either way about
how the US goes after Iraq. Now there were a few editorials both for and against
such action, most suggested that while it is probably necessary, the US, should
either 1.) Get permission from NATO, and other European powers, or 2.) Go ahead
but don't ask us for help, or 3.) Mind our own business, leave the middle east
to middle easterners, and attack only when attacked.
None of this comes as a surprise to me, what did surprise me was all the hell
that other nations are suffering right now with the bad economy world wide, and
their internal problems. They seem to face major problems, many of which come
from the very social programs that many here in the US want us to go with, such
as socialized medicine (200 health care workers jobs cut!) (Doctors on strike!)
and so forth. One paper what complained that since guns are band, the increase
of attacks by knife and hatchet are up, no surprise there, when someone wants
to kill they take what is handy to do the job.
It was an eye opener. Now we spent the day on a trip to Bismarck where we got
the shelves the wife has wanted since we moved into this house, and I haven't
heard any news on TV, but I did find in many of the European papers that the US
has been shopping charities to dispatch 6.6 million dollars to the poor and injured
in Iraq.
This could well fit with Howard's hunch that the shit is about to hit the fan
for Saddam, who by the way according to one paper was just nominated again by
unamouse vote by the ruling council for another term as President of Iraq.
See, and you thought I couldn't read. (Just kidding)
Write on, the world needs your voice now more then ever.
Jerry 8-16-2002 1:13
Dunno if it means anything, but we got word tonight that the wedding we
were to attend the day after tomorrow has been postponed indefinitely. The groom
is unable to be here because his leave has been cancelled. He's in the Navy, stationed
on the west coast. He had applied for the leave and been approved, with the good
wishes of his commander. They notified him yesterday -- three days before the
wedding -- that his leave is cancelled.
D'ya suppose something is about to break loose?
howard 8-16-2002 0:35
RANDALL
Hey!
Have I got a story for you! (Giggle) Boy is this rich! (Chortle, chortle) Talk
about a key word ... rich! No, no we haven't won the lottery or anything like
that. Well, it seems that two major restaurants are about to begin construction
within a block of our store. TWO! Won't have to drive anywhere! No sir! Walk over
and eat lunch! Great!
During the course of the last few months there have been hoards of persons examining
the future adjoining construction sites. Various contractors examining two old
buildings that will have to be removed. Men and women in hard hats spraying orange
paint at various locations on the ground, surveying, plotting, writing on clipboards.
And the core drillers. A lot of core drilling.
These core drillers are small, truck mounted drills that take samples of sub-surface
materials. As the store delivery driver I have noted these operations on a daily
basis. The core drilling has increased to such a frenzy that sometimes one crew
will have to wait till another is finished before they move on site and begin!
I mean, they have drilled so many holes it's a wonder the whole area doesn't sink!
We're talking about an acre or so in size and the core drilling goes on! Day and
night!
I recently talked to a man I know outside the store. He runs a crew that does
dirt work. You know, the men who build pads that businesses sit on? These guys
own backhoes, small loaders, dump trucks and a crew of hung-over, longhair, scruffy
looking, blue-jeaned construction workers. I asked him if he was doing the dirt
work?
"Well, not sure now," he replied wiping sweat out from his hard hat. "There may
not be any construction at all."
"What?" I asked as we watched a large core drilling rig pull onto the property.
While we looked the hard hats swarmed around and within minutes another hole was
being drilled.
"They found sub-surface contamination. A lot, and the insurance companies are
hesitant to proceed. That's why there is so much sampling going on."
One of the businesses to be torn down was an old gasoline station. No surprise
there on contamination. The old timers routinely dumped used crankcase oil behind
the station and never replaced underground tanks. Consequently, a lot of gasoline
and diesel leaked into the soil. The EPA has put out of business thousands of
mom and pop gasoline stations because they were unable to dig up and replace leaking
tanks. Too expensive.
"But that's not the major problem Randy." He grinned at me. "They're finding crude
oil. Shallow pockets of natural gas and crude oil. It seems there is a pool of
oil underneath us that runs over a mile south."
CRUDE OIL? Texas Tea! Black Gold! West Texas crude is going for 25 bucks a barrel!
By the gift of nature, free money! Good Lord! All ya gotta do is drill and case
the hole and put up a pump jack. Call Haliburton Production, (Vice President,
Dick Cheney's old outfit) and watch the money flow in! The stuff of legendary
oil men! (H. L. Hunt who in 1981 tried to corner the silver market ... world wide!
His brother Lamar who owns the NFL Kansas City Chiefs football team.) Instant
wealth! From mule to Cadillac in a heartbeat! From tent to a swanky Houston penthouse!
Overnight! Shades of J.R. Ewing! Edna Ferber wrote a novel about Crude Oil ...
to some a testimony akin to the Bible. A little tome called GIANT ... a movie
was made, pouty James Dean and stalwart Rock Hudson and luscious Liz Taylor.
Beautiful, black, stinking OIL! CRUDE OIL! Why, the very thought brings to mind
the legendary "Spindletop" well in south Texas. When she hit it blew thirty foot
joints of drill stem, top of the derrick, a greatly pleased tool pusher and a
couple of startled roughnecks yards high. Spindletop! Blowing out thousands of
barrels of oil a day! Crude Oil! Without Crude Oil no GM, no Ford, no airliner,
no nutting! The stinkiest, gooiest, most awful liquid you will ever come across...and
its right under our feet. Screw the Arabs! We got our own, and it's right here!
My friend noticed the look on my face. "Not enough for production though. Just
enough to mess up the whole show."
He grinned. "Ain't that a bitch. Imagine a fellow in some office somewhere staring
at the lab reports. All he wants to do is build a restaurant and the location
is atop a low yield pool of oil! Seventy-five years ago, this would have been
a minor strike. Now it's just a headache. Thats gotta hurt. More money in "Burgers
and fries and cherry pies" than in oil production."
As an August sun blazed down, we watched another core drilling pull up.
Crude Oil! Who needs it!
Tina...thats ok. With a stiff upper lip and hands on the table I'll read your
stories.
Randall
Randall 8-15-2002 22:09
There's been a lot of talk of the new laws allowing the government more
power so they can catch terrorists. One such law that has yet to be passed, and
I pray it is never passed, will require our local postman to report on any activity
he deems dangerous.
I can see us now looking on all federal employees as enemies, much as the good
people of Germany became fearful of those who wore the swastika.
I can see it now, Ralph the postman is angry because Beth has failed to give him
a Christmas gift as most of those on his route do. To get even with Beth, he reports
to his superiors that he has seen meetings taking place at Beth's place where
many Arab men gather and he has seen them reading the Koran.
Now in actuality, Beth is a member of the local Methodist church, and has never
even heard of the Koran, except on the nightly news, yet two days later, members
of the combined federal task force on terrorism sneak up to her front door, and
on the command of the unit commander signals the invasion, machine gun carrying
SWAT members rush her house, breaking the door, tearing their way through her
pristine home where photo's of her children in their youth are knocked to the
floor, the glass ground into the very fabric of her carpet. She is located in
her sewing room where she is cross stitching a pattern of Old Glory, and taken
into custody for interrogation by the terrorists investigative forces. She is
held seven days without being charged, and on the statement of the postman, is
transported to Getmo and imprisoned with the prisoners of war, to be interrogated
by investigators there.
The neighbors whisper at her duplicity, her ability to mask her religious beliefs,
her Arab herriatige beneath her old grey hair. Marble Smith tells her neighbors
that she never trusted that old bat, always knew there was something different
in the pickles she made for the state fair, after all how could she have won that
blue ribbon seven years running!
The rest of the folks on the mail route are even more generous with their mail
carrier, and he is happy with the results of his little game. Who will be next
to be caught by the terror police/mailmen?
Will it be me, or maybe you?
Jerry 8-15-2002 21:09
Here's one of the sites I visit regularly for a bit of down to earth talk
of what's happening in today's military and the world.
Jerry Soldiers for the Truth
8-15-2002 19:31
JERRY/MARK -- I've been reading and hearing too much about this "righteous
war" too, and I'm just hoping and praying that it's not just political posturing.
I do admire and support our president, but at the same time I recognise that he's
human, and susceptible to the same failures as anyone else.
Then again, from what I've been reading over the past dozen or so years, Saddam
is an evil blot on the face of the earth. He cares nothing for his own people,
having demonstrated his disdain for human life in attacking even his own, and
in placing them deliberately in harm's way.
Perhaps we should practice some "stain removal" and put him under. But
I'd hate to think we're doing it for the wrong reasons.
Thanks for the site MARK! Looks interesting, and I'll check it out later tonight.
howard 8-15-2002 16:45
I know this is probably too long, but it's a true story, and it just kind
of poured out.
Bob was headed home. He hit 'resume' on the cruise control, and the big Olds accelerated
away from the toll booth on the Garden State.
He'd just stopped to call Elsa, to tell her he'd be there around 3AM. She had
protested that it was too late, that he ought to stop at a motel to rest for the
night, but he was in a hurry. He'd made this trip so many times that he could
do it in his sleep if he had to.
"That's what I'm afraid of," she'd said, "please, if you get to feeling too tired
just pull over and rest for a while."
"I will," he'd reassured her, "but right now I don't feel a bit tired."
He had turned off the air conditioning and opened the window, thinking the fresher
outside air would keep him alert. And no radio tonight -- he wanted to think about
his son, and about the donut shop. It was getting near retirement time, and he
was worried that Bill was more interested in girls and cars than in keeping the
family business going. "I guess there are more important things in life than getting
up early to make donuts," he mused.
He glanced at his mirror to check on traffic coming up behind as he approached
the merge lanes. "No sense getting flattened by a tractor-trailer," he thought,
still feeling a shiver as he remembered the last trip.
Something caught his attention as he looked back at the toll booth. A car was
coming on way too fast to have stopped, and it was accelerating and catching up
to him. He glanced at his speedometer. "Sixty -- that guy must be doing seventy
already!"
He tapped the brake to disengage the cruise so that the other car would be past
him before he reached the merge point. "Let him go, and hope I don't have to stop
to pick up any pieces if he flips that thing down the road!"
The other driver came roaring by, and the next couple of seconds seemed to slow
down and stretch into an eternity. He could hear loud music playing from the 8-track
cranked up to the limit as they caught up to him. Strangely he recognised it --
"Sounds like the tape Bill listens to." He looked closer in his side mirror and
saw there were at least three, maybe four people in the car. He caught a glimpse
of something flashing through the air, then felt the crushing pain in his arm
as something shattered against it. He smelled the beer as the quart bottle exploded
against his arm and another on the window frame, showering him with shards of
broken glass and splattering him with beer. And he heard wild laughing and someone
yelling "You crazy s-o-b! I said not at the window!" as the car sped on by him
and disappeared into the blackness ahead.
And then the lurch and bump, and the scream of metal on concrete as the big sedan
jumped the concrete curbing and rode it to a stop a hundred feet down the road.
And then silence.
The siren in the distance told him that he was still alive, but he was hurting
like hell. His arm alternated between numbness and excruciating pain, and the
side of his face stung where the glass had embedded in his cheek. He could smell
oil and antifreeze, and remembered that the car was overdue for an oil change,
and he'd better take it in to have the cooling system checked in the morning.
The siren grew louder, and it began to get on his nerves. "Why do they have to
run that thing so loud? I've already got a headache, and why is everything all
blurry?" The noise stopped as if he'd wished it away, and he tried to smile gratefully,
but it was more like a grimace as he sensed someone walking toward the car.
"Please step out of the car, sir." The voice sounded angry, or disgusted. "Now!
Out of the car!"
Bob tried to move, but couldn't -- tried to talk, but all he could do was mumble
incoherently.
The officer reached for the door just as his partner walked up. "I said ge.. Oh
Jesus! Carl -- help me get him out!" What the hell happened to him?"
"I dunno, John," exclaimed his partner. "I can smell the beer, but I don't think
he was drinking it. Looks like he got hit with a bottle! I'll call for an ambulance!"
They eased Bob to the ground beside the car and the first officer began to check
over his injuries while the second ran back to radio for medical help. "Did you
get a description of whoever did this?" asked the cop.
Bob shook his head. It was beginning to clear now, and the pain was increasing.
"No," he rasped, "just caught a flash of blue as they went by. Three guys, maybe
four." He groaned again as the cop checked his arm.
"It's broke for sure," he said, "but all the blood's coming from your head."
"I think they got me with two bottles. First one hit my arm. The second one hit
the door frame and scattered back at me." Everything started to go blurry again.
"Just relax and don't try to talk any more," said the cop. "The ambulance is almost
here."
Bob tried to nod, but it hurt too much. He grimaced again as he heard the approaching
siren. Then he lost consciousness again as the ambulance arrived.
They took him to the ER at the local hospital, where it was determined that his
injuries, though serious and painful, were not life-threatening. They cleaned
up his face, sewed up the gash over his eyebrow and removed the splinters of glass
from his cheek. Then they x-rayed and re-splinted his arm, and told him that the
ortho guy would have to fit him with a cast as soon as the swelling went down.
Then the nurse asked what he'd like for breakfast.
"Haven't got time for that," he insisted. My wife is expecting me, and I've got
to get home. Got a business to run! Please, where's my clothes and my car?"
The ER staff protested, but he was adamant, and signed himself out. His car had
been towed to a service station near the hospital, and he found the mechanic checking
it over as he arrived.
"This your vehicle?" asked the station owner. "Stan says it needs an alignment
real bad, and there's a busted oil line. Nothing really serious, but it needs
fixing before you drive it very far. Geez -- are you all right?"
"How long to fix the oil line?" asked Bob, ignoring the stares of the owner and
the mechanic.
"'Bout ten minutes," said the mechanic. "No trouble to fix it right now. But the
alignment will take most of the morning. Gotta take it over to the tire shop for
that."
"Can I make it home the way it is?" asked Bob, "I'm in a hurry -- late already."
"Well I guess," said the mechanic, "but I wouldn't drive it too far the way it
is."
"OK, just the line then, and I'll take care of the rest when I get home." Bob
looked around, "Got a phone so I can call my wife and let her know where I am?
She's probably worried sick!"
He thanked the man, and limped into the office to call Elsa, moving stiffly all
the way.
His wife was indeed worried, but calmed down as he told her that he'd only had
a bit of car trouble, and would be home around noon. "And then we'll sit down
and talk to Billy again. I think I really want to retire this time."
The Olds pulled to the right all the way home, just as the mechanic had said it
would, but eventually he pulled into the driveway and shut it off. There was that
hot oil smell again, and the tic-tic-tic that he hadn't heard before. "Guess I'd
better see about getting rid of this one, and maybe getting something smaller.
Wonder if the insurance will cover any of it?"
Elsa nearly became hysterical when she saw the bandages and splint, but he calmed
her down, joking about it until she actually laughed at the thought of the cop
ordering him out of the car. "He thought I was a drunk driver, until he saw all
the blood!"
They had lunch, and talked with Billy, who was also unnerved at the sight of his
father's injuries. "Yes, dad, I'll take it from here. It's time you did retire,
and I do know what needs to be done."
"He opened this morning, dear," said Elsa, "as soon as we realized you weren't
going to be home in time he went down and got everything ready for the morning
crew."
"That's good to hear, Bill, I'm just getting too old and tired to keep this up
much longer. Speaking of tired, I think I'll take a nap for a while -- it's been
a long drive!"
"I think I'll join you," said his wife, "I never get much sleep when you're on
the road anyway."
They went up to the bedroom, where Bob laid himself down gingerly. Elsa helped
him get his shoes and outer clothes off, and stretched out beside him, and they
both drifted off to a fitful sleep.
Soon she was awakened by a choking noise, and sat up to see and hear her husband
breathe his last, as a massive blood clot from the shattered arm invaded his heart
and lungs, overwhelming them. Death followed quickly as she sat helplessly holding
him, pleading for him not to go.
Somewhere near the Garden State Parkway there are three or four young killers.
Unaware, yet murderers all the same. Their fun and games were directly responsible
for my uncle's death, and even though it's been twenty-some years, we still remember.
And we hope and pray that somehow they'll remember too.
howard 8-15-2002 15:12
JERRY -- You say that you are seeing a whole load of information on the
coming war and it all seems to echo the same sentiment about how that war would
be 'right.' The link below is to a website with wildly alternate views expressed
in dark, dark humor. Reading the cartoons there, I laughed until I cried. They
take on the war in Afganistan, CEO honesty, political shenanigans, etc.
The really telling point (for me) in your post was the notion that maybe you've
read too much and are writing too little. Amen, Brother. I need a balance in my
life, and I'm sure I can bury my head in my own thoughts until the only world
I know is the world in my head. Similarly, I can study the published world until
I have no original ideas, until I know (on any event) only what other people think.
I am a man of extremes. I've done drunkenness and sobriety, war and peace, hate
and love. I know what I eat and what eats me.
Even my search for centeredness could be called extreme. I console myself with
the notion that at least I no longer seek the extreme outside edge of things.
In 1988 or 89 I fell asleep in front of the news about a possible Hurricane strike
right on Port Arthur / Beaumont. I woke up to find that the hurricane had sped
up, hit the coast, and we were too late to evacuate in front of it. I was happy.
I wanted that experience. Turned out that the roughest part of the storm landed
just West of us and went through the sparsely populated areas between Beaumont
and Houston. Oh, well. We had a couple feet of rain. We were flooded. I put up
a stack of cinder blocks in the back yard so the dog had a place to squat. Friends
on the bayou had alligators in their backyards. I felt cheated. It had been too
easy.
Mark dark humor
8-15-2002 14:48
Hi All :)
Just a quick pop-in to say hi. The writing has been going fairly steady the past
couple of days though I do need to do some major research to fill in some holes.
If I do that, then I should have a stand-alone chapter that can be submitted as
a short somewhere. The only danger with that is getting so involved with the research
that I don't write. I hate trying to make a decision like this. There's pros and
cons for me both ways. I really don't want to stall out on this story like I have
with so many others in the past. I'm enjoying this one way too much. Then again,
maybe that enjoyment will pull me back into the story with less problems then
I faced in the past. Perhaps I'll flip a coin. Course, then I won't be able to
decide whether to call heads or tails. hehehehe Nope, after getting that off my
chest here with you all -- I'll keep writing while the flow is going and then
when I've got one of those days when I can't think of the next word -- I'll research
and get the motivation to get going again. That sounds like a plan don't it??
Have a fun day everyone!
Carol 8-15-2002 12:26
Hi all!
Thanks guys for pumping up my ego ;-)
Randall, how about I put a warning at the beginning of my skydiving posts, hmmm?
You know, something like, 'WARNING: the following post contains explicit details
that height fearing individuals may find disturbing'.
Jerry, you know, your post about media and mixed messages was written very eloquently.
To get a wider picture, though, check out the sites put up by people who oppose
what's happening, and international sites for a POV outside of the US. You may
find info that will rock your socks off.
Jumping tomorrow. Can't wait (she says while sighing a long, impatient sigh...)
Blue skies!
Tina 8-15-2002 10:57
Ok so here I sit with my new celeron computer, and it works just fine. Got
the new processor for the old one today, and installed it in the wife's machine
(she took my old machine when I got my new one) and it still locked up. Decided
to part it out, and as I took off the cover, I figured one last try, took the
ram out of the machine the wife used to use, and put it in the old machine, and
all is well with the my old (the wife's new) athlon screamer.
So now I have a brand new HP with a celeron 1.2 gig processor that runs about
half the speed of the wife's 1 gig athlon machine. Well it could be that 64 meg
video card I had in the athlon vs the 32 megger in this one.
Oh well the wife deserves the best, after all she does have to put up with me
every day.
Listening to some stupid news show today, when the reporter revealed that this
sudden rash of child stealing isn't something new. In fact he reported this year
has been slow compared to other years when many more children have been stolen.
The difference? Well the press decided to cover them now.
You know how the press is, once they bite into a subject, they beat it till it's
very dead, and very tender.
Not that there's anything wrong with the coverage of stolen children, my god the
problem is where were they last year when there were more children stolen by the
same month last year? Well they were chasing political stories, and were too busy
to be bothered by missing kids.
Write on.
Jerry 8-15-2002 0:10
Randall
Hey!
Tina...I must request you refrain from further stories relating to jumping out
of an airplane. Unless there is a real emergency of course. I don't know if it's
the dad in me or the scardy cat in me, BUT YOU"RE SCARING THE BEJESUS OUT OF ME!
There, it's out in the open. (Grin)
Mountain climbing is high on my list of no no's, leaping carefree from a airplane
... way before that! I got chill bumps watching VERTICAL LIMIT. Indeed spent several
moments peering around a kitchen wall at the TV as the climbers attacked K2 cause
I couldn't sit down!
Well, anyway, you be careful lady!
Wow! Howard, now that's hot!!!
Randall
Randall 8-14-2002 22:08
Tina - Thank you so much for that trip through the sky. You have taken my
old broken body places where it can never go, places where I can only dream about.
I was there with you from the ground to the step of the plane and back to the
ground again. Super writing.
I sit here tonight watching a TV special on the war in Afghanistan, while our
President has us at the very edge of the cliff, one more step will lead our nation,
and our brave young men in uniform into yet another war.
I have to stop and think about this one. I know the President is probably right,
I know the history of Sadam Insane, and I know that it needs to happen, yet somehow
it doesn't feel right. To start another war, oh sure we'll probably win, but at
what cost?
I look around and see most of the rest of the world saying they will not stand
by us if we invade, and I wonder if it's right, if they're right.
Such things happening now, the attack on our nation, a war still being fought
in Afghanistan, and now another just around the corner.
I examine my feelings, and find that while I don't hate all Muslims (heck I don't
even know any Muslims) I'm not happy at what I hear in the press, and what I don't
hear.
Sources on the internet say that all Muslims wish to see the downfall of our great
nation, even those who enjoy it's freedom, it's hospitality, and I wonder who's
telling the truth. The sites I find this information at are sites that I feel
I should trust. Trust even more then the press, and after the last election fiasco,
I find that I trust the press less and less every day. The site's I am going to
are put up there by real hero's from past wars, hero's who wear their medals proudly,
and speak the language of warriors, a language I understand. They speak of the
coming war with Iraq, and say it will be right, but again, I find myself doubting
them.
I guess there's just too much information out there, and I spend way too much
time looking at the information, and way too little time writing, I must get back
to writing again, when I write I am free of the worries of the world, free from
the terror of another war on the horizon, free from 9-11. When I am writing I
become my characters, I live their lives, love their loves, fear their fears.
Some say reading is the best escape, but their wrong, writing is a much better
escape, to just write and not worry about spelling, not worry about word usage,
just tell the story, let it flow, live the life of the characters, what could
be more of an escape then that?
Oh and I had my day off today, did nothing but sit on my ass and play with my
new computer.
Tomorrow is my wife's birthday, I have some plans for her special day, she has
to go to a neighboring town to pick up some meat for my mom, while she's gone
I can get up town and get some balloons and such to decorate the house a bit.
I hope she likes it.
The next day it's our thirty-third wedding anniversary, I must come up with a
small gift, as she want's a recliner for her birthday/anniversary gift, and while
we've exhausted the possibilities here in town with no results, we are planning
a trip up north to Bismarck where we can look for just the right one. There were
plenty of chairs here, but none that match her decorating scheme. I don't know
a thing about decorating, hell I would have bought her a nice blue recliner, but
my chair is brown and the couch is beige with brown stripes. The floor covering
is earth tone, the drapes off white with brown specks. Guess she wants a brown
chair.
Anyhow I'm filling the page with my babble.
Write ON!
Jerry 8-14-2002 0:21
Just got this from a friend -- it just about says it all:
How hot is it in upsatae New York?
The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
The trees are whistling for the dogs.
The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
Hot water now comes out of both taps.
You can make sun tea instantly.
You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.
You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.
Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out
and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one
out and add butter, salt and pepper.
Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from
laying hard boiled eggs.
The cows are giving evaporated milk.
howrad 8-14-2002 0:02
TINA -- Wow! Wonderful! That had better find its way into print along with
the rest of your jump memoirs! Awesome!
I'm sitting here reading email and checking the notebook while another bat (a
smaller one this time) is swooping around my head -- just flew right over the
monitor -- I looked up (haven't tried to stand up yet) and it flew directly past
my face, within about six inches of my nose! This room is about 12x15 ft, and
you should see this critter corner! They're really beautiful creatures! So graceful!
We have several roof windows, and never bothered to put the screens in them.
He just flew out. 'Bye, bat!
Only had one or two in past years, but this is the second bat this week! Better
them than the mosquitos!
We get birds once in a while as well, and I have to watch out for the hornets,
but no way could we do without the windows. Besides, the cat likes to come in
and out them at night.
Still no rain, and I've got strawberry plants coming sometime this week. We've
got a spring a little ways from here, just across the river from here. It's been
running for many years, and the water is excellent. We've been drinking it off
and on for years. There are a couple of pipes coming out of the spring, and the
water flows freely out of them and into a concrete cistern by the road.
So I made up a slip-fitting adapter to slide over the end of one of the pipes
so that I can run a hose from it to a couple of plastic drums in the back of my
truck. It takes a while to fill up the drums, but I can read or write while I'm
waiting.
At home I can back the truck right up the the garden, where another adapter lets
me water my garden without overdrawing my well.
I think the strawberries will be happy.
howard 8-13-2002 23:51
For your further amusement... the next installment of my skydiving adventures.
***
I arrive at the dropzone to find it very quiet. The usual crowd is absent, and
only a few determined regulars have shown up. I wave a greeting to those nearby
as I heft my gear bag from the truck.
My gear bag. Implying, of course, that I have gear. For three months I’ve dreamed
about showing up at the dropzone with my own rig, and now here I am, toting my
heavy red gear-bag into the clubhouse. It feels surreal, and that makes me giddy.
Finding a clear spot in the clubhouse, I put everything down. Only a moment later
Tom pokes his head inside. “Tina, hi. Hey, are you jumping?” I nod, he nods, and
that quickly I’m on a load. I wander outside, knowing that it will be awhile before
I need to get ready. The plane just took off with a tandem load.
I love this laid back, relaxing atmosphere. A few busy people are packing their
gear, most just sit in the sun. I join them, happy to be at the dropzone. Twenty
minutes later we hear the jump plane approaching on jumprun. I use my binoculars
to watch my friends exit; I never tire of seeing that moment when skydivers leave
the plane.
Tom reappears with a question. “Are you going to the top?” I shrug. I’ve only
jumped this gear twice, both hop and pops from just 5500 feet, and I’m not sure
if I should go all the way to 10,000 yet. But I want to.
Soon, it’s time to gear up and I need to decide. I find Koyne, one of my instructors,
and ask him if I’m cleared to go all the way up. I’m thrilled when he agrees.
As I pull on my jumpsuit, Tom asks me again. I tell him, “Yup, all the way.” Tom
grins, and I know that he knew I wanted to.
I check my gear, turn on my cypress, and borrow a helmet and goggles. While I’m
getting ready I realise that I need to decide what to do on this dive. I can do
anything I want, and I’m not used to that much choice. I decide to work on my
door dive, then just enjoy being stable and doing turns without potato chipping.
I’ll pull high, so I can continue working with my new chute. And then, hopefully,
land near the target and on my feet.
Now it’s time, and I have Bob give me a gear check. He’s very thorough, and I
really appreciate that. Especially when he notices that I’m not wearing my altimeter!
I’d grabbed it earlier, and then set it down. I like to think I’d have noticed
its absence before heading for the plane, but mentally I chastise myself for such
simple negligence. Bad Tina.
Because I will be the last person out of the plane, I get the comfortable seat
behind the pilot. Wings of excitement begin to beat in my stomach as Taylor the
pilot taxis out, and then we are speeding up and lifting off and now we are in
the air. I can’t see outside very well, but that’s the trade for the comfy seat.
And my stomach is not complaining at all as we take to the air, a small blessing
that has taken 28 jumps to accomplish. No, the anticipation sends a tingle through
my skin, but the nervous fear is very mellow now, smothered beneath the joy I
know I’ll be experiencing soon. Still, caution makes me touch my pull and handles.
They are positioned slightly differently on this rig than on the student rig I’m
used to, and I want my arms to know where to reach when the time comes.
The other guys are doing a three way, and I ask them how much separation they
want. I tell Taylor the pilot that I’m pulling high. I check my handles again.
I compare my altimeter reading with Tad’s. I visualise what I’m doing on this
jump. I chat with the guys to pass the time to altitude. And through it all, I
don’t feel the fear that is usually coursing through me. I want this so much,
and right now I want to be getting out that door and into the air. Just me and
Beauty, my chute, alone in the air so high above the earth that casual eyes looking
up would not see me. I want to savour the entire jump.
My altimeter reads 8500 feet as the plane pulls onto jumprun, carefully lining
up with the spot we want to be above when we get out. We all shift and move, pull
on our helmets and goggles, and wait. We pump each other up with cheers and funky
handshakes and thumbs up until Taylor calls, “Door!” That word turns us all serious,
because here is the moment we each dream about and it’s time to fly. Bob looks
out the door to check our spot… and we are too far south. He shakes his head and
signals for a go around. What fun! Taylor banks the Cessna into a tight turn,
and in only a few minutes we are lined up and ready to go. Again, the door opens
and wind rushes in and the guys climb out. I’ve never seen a three way exit, and
I’d like to watch them closely, but I need to get in position. The plane rocks
gently when they let go, and Taylor deftly adjusts for it.
Here I am. My altimeter reads 9500 feet above the ground, I am half out of the
door of the airplane and perched on the step. The wind calls to me, and I imagine
it to be a pillow lying on the earth, but also a pale blanket that waits to wrap
around my falling body. Broken clouds are scattered across the sky, Vernon and
the airport wait far below me. I can smell the metal of the plane, clean air,
and the foam in my helmet. The prop blasts the air behind me and whisks a glove
of wind over the plane. No other sounds can reach me here. It’s as if the world
has stopped while I perch on the edge of time. There is no hesitation, not today.
I count out the separation delay and then release myself into uncertainty; I let
go and dive into mid-air.
I’m stable! Yes! Arms out, head up, knees bent sharply. Now stretch it out into
a nice arch… what happened? I tumble once over my side, arch hard and turn
onto my stomach. Ahhh, more like that, yes.
9000 feet up in the sky, when no one is with you and even the birds are absent,
and only the wind is keeping you company, it is remarkable to discover that you
fully believe that this is home. I am falling, I am flying, I am perfectly happy.
Alone with the company of my thoughts, I have found a new place in which I belong.
The pale blue sky is everywhere, the earth is everywhere, the mountains are everywhere,
and I feel their heartbeat as I choose a heading and just stay there, looking
out over the ageless world. I am perfectly free.
Okay, now I’ll do a 90o turn right, and now left. 360o’s left, and then right.
I stop and go, feeling the pressure of the wind as I manipulate my position in
it. When my altimeter reads 5500 feet, I stop and wait. Wave off at 5000, return
to a stable arch for just a moment, and then reach for my pull.
What is that in the way? Damn, it’s cloth, something bundled up. My sleeve? Damn!
But I can feel my pull beneath the cloth and I will not feel anxious, I grope
a little and then it is in my hand and I toss it. My pilot chute comes out, and
relief flies alongside. I’m slanted a bit… will that affect my opening? Not this
time. The wind breathes into the pilot chute, and then I feel Beauty pulling me
upright. She is brilliantly yellow and red and black against the pale sky, and
we are flying together. I take a deep breath, and I notice then that I’d held
my breath when I couldn’t find my pull immediately. I’d wondered about that, how
you could possibly not find the pull, and now I know how easy it would be.
My Beauty wants to sing, yearns to fly, and now she is able to, running with the
wind. We are partners, and I direct her to turn, to stall, to surge forward and
slow down. We thrill through the sky, playfully trying stalls, flat turns, and
spirals. I push her a bit faster than I did on our previous jumps, and she responds
with glee. I can tell that she and I will have many wonderful jumps together.
Around 1500 feet there is some turbulence, and I work my controls to keep her
even. She is so different from the student gear, she responds to my commands and
to the playful wind much more quickly, and I treat her with caution as we descend
below 1000 feet and turn onto the approach pattern. I fly my Beauty very carefully,
turning flat and never tempting fate. A malfunction would be very dangerous this
close to landing.
The ground comes up so quickly now, and I let her fly with only a few small adjustments
to stay into the wind. I judge my height, ready, wait for it… now I should
flare now but no wait for it! I can see every blade of grass now, okay, Flare!
And I pull down firmly and step out of the air onto the very edge of the trimmed
grass. I’m on my feet! Beauty collapses into the weeds, and I’ll have to shake
out the seeds later. But right now I let out a whooping holler, because I have
once again saved my life with a wing of nylon. Not just the life sustained by
blood and heartbeat, but the life sustained by reaching beyond the routine of
my life and discovering that I have more in me than the world has ever known or
demanded of me before. In a world where the dance of life is never ending, I have
finally found my song.
Tina 8-13-2002 22:44
Hi all!
Rachel, did you get to the airshow? We were there on Saturday, and it was, as
always, awesome. The Snowbirds are my favourite; they easily outflew and outperformed
the Thunderbirds. The Thunderbirds were very very good, but the Snowbirds have
a grace and fluidity that the bigger jets can't achieve. The only disappointment
was that the early clouds prevented Manfred from flying his sailplane, and the
F117 Bomber was only on static display for a few hours and I missed it. It flew,
and that was kick butt, but I didn't get to see it up close. The B2 bomber came
by also, but didn't land. THAT is a very cool aircraft. No wonder people thought
it was a UFO when it was still classified.
On Sunday we drove into Vancouver to the IMAX at Canada Place, and saw 'Space
Station'. If you ever get the chance to see it, just do it. It was phenominal.
Most of the footage was shot by astronauts while on the ISS. I think I would do
almost anything to get up there. Wish I'd had this burning desire when I was younger,
and the possibility existed of going to school and getting up there.
Got to reading and editing 'Shadow' during the trip to the coast, and now I have
some new ideas and the writing bug has bitten me again. I'm glad. Although I'm
thoroughly enjoying my skydiving obsession, I didn't want to lose the writing
bug. My muse must've known better than to compete, and backed off for awhile.
BUT now she's back. Yay!
As for 'comfortable'... I say it 'cumfterble'. Ya gotta love the english language,
huh?
Blue skies!
Tina 8-13-2002 21:34
Hi All :)
While there are clouds in the sky and a cool breeze blowing, its still a nice
day. I'm in a good mood and revved up for adding to my story. But, first I'll
gab at you all for a few minutes. You don't mind do ya? heheheh
Elaine - its hard to know what words to throw at you to motivate you to work on
your other pieces. If they are stalled, there could be a number of reasons for
it. Not knowing what you're working on, I'll just out some stuff and see what
happens. Maybe you need to kill off a character, or make one deathly sick, or
give him a "happy" event with potentially sad repercussions. An example of a happy
event with sad repercussions -- a man loses custody of his young son, years later
the missing son wishes to see his birth father once again. By now, said man has
a new family, is well settled and happy. What effect will this missing child,
who he wants to see desperately, have on the serenity of his new family?
Life experiences do indeed give us everything we need to write. I am most proud
of a flash fiction I wrote as the result of hours of watching the northern lights.
I encapsulated the experience, the thrill, the awe, into 498 words and that little
piece has been published three times. Any thing you experience, you add into your
work in one way or another. Whatever captures your attention, add into your work.
You see a person walking on the street, they stumble over nothing. Put that "image"
in your story and have your character do this repeatedly, intensifing and exaggerating.
Randall -- my parents were watching the original Peter Pan this weekend -- I believe
I saw a commerical for a remake coming out soon! :)
Heather -- while that birthday avoidance will make good fodder for writing, I
fear that genetic trait will catch up to me in the near future. heheeh When I
was young, I'd yell at Mom for coloring her hair, it turned gray in such a pretty
fashion. HA! Years later, my own hair is turning gray in the very same pattern,
but I'm coloring it over anyways! Its that gray texture, you know, that bothers
me more than anything else. ;)
Jerry - here's wishing you a nice quiet day of work. {hug}
Carol 8-13-2002 15:12
Yes indeed!
TODAY'S QUOTE:
"How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?"
--Jay Leno
howrad 8-13-2002 12:44
Randall you are absolutely right. Speaking of ducks, the other day we took
a drive in the country, and saw a mother duck with her chicks. The chicks were
several months old, small duck now not really chicks anymore. As we sat and watched
the mother and her brood walking across the prairie, they came to a stream bed
that until a couple of days ago was plum empty, now it held a bit of water in
the path of the duck parade.
The mother duck came to the water, and happily swam to the other side. You could
see the confusion on the little ones. They looked from side to side, quacked at
their mother a few times, then walked nearly a block north to where the stream
bed was dry and walked across.
I don't know what you would call it, but I had one of those thoughts, and when
I got home I rattled off a letter to the Governor explaining the incident, and
requesting he go to the legislature for some funds to teach young ducklings to
swim.
Yep, we've been having a drought, a bad drought, so bad that ducks no longer know
how to swim.
I haven't been doing much writing of late, in fact it's been a very busy week
or two, what with hauling the camper back and forth to get it fixed, then there
was the computer purchase, the fish purchase, both of which were in conjunction
with the camper hauls. Yesterday we called an early end to the pinochle games
and came home to mow the lawn, boy that felt good to mow again, I didn't think
I'd get to do that chore again till next spring, but the recent rains have been
doing some good. Too late for the garden though, the only things growing were
the tomato plants and weeds. I cut the weeds down with the mower, that was over
half the garden but it looks much better now.
When I was finished mowing we hauled the clippings out to the dump grounds, I
always use my bagger on the mower, keeps the lawn nicer I think. Anyhow when we
finished unloading the clippings we had to go to the other side of the dumps where
household garbage is mingled with tree branches, and as we unloaded the branches
I noticed a computer desk, well a bunch of parts that when assembled would be
a computer desk.
We picked up the pieces and brought them home, I spent the rest of the day reassembling
the thing, and when I was finished we had a very nice very heavy computer desk
that the wife fell in love with.
Today was spent rearranging furniture so she could have her desk, and tearing
down nearly all the computers in the house to move them to their new places. Boy
am I beat, I'll sleep good tonight.
After the busy week, I am silently wishing I could go back to work again, just
so I could have a day off.
Write ON!
Jerry 8-12-2002 23:43
RANDALL
Evening...
Elaine...Writing what you know works for me. Somewhere in your life are life experiences
you can use in story telling. Something you saw, a whisper of a conversation,
something you heard. A pair of bats flying across a full moon in October. A young
woman sitting on a wood corral fence as the sun sets behind her. (Happened to
me!) Let your imagination flow. I recently saw a man leading a flock of ducks
down the side of a bayou that runs thru town. The old noggin kicked in and now
the short story I'm writing is nearly finished.
What were your experiences growing up? In the city? Country? Is there a novel
there? (Sorry Mark.) A short story perhaps? A page? A paragraph? One sentence?
No? Well, just one word will do! Everything is fodder for the story in a writers
mind. How about just an idea? Yours? Your parents? What did your grandfather do.
Your grandmother. Anything there? The horizon is wide open! Every single incident
your eyes behold ... every word your ears hear ... a book read years ago? I read
PETER PAN when I was 12 and never got over it. (I'm 55 now and sure wish Peter
and Tinker Bell would show up soon! Times, they are a' running out!) It sent me
into the realm of fantasy/adventure and I'm stuck there. "Second star to the right
and on till morning."
In the greater scheme of things, it makes little diff what you write, just do
IT! Volume makes you better! At least, that is writing to me. :-) Good luck!
Randall
Randall 8-12-2002 22:41
Thanks y'all,
The lines were getting fuzzy on which one is my real projects or what ones are
there just because. I realized before that it was becoming into a real project
and not the practice one that it began as I began it. What I really need is motivation
for each of my projects that will bring each of them up to the level of my "practice"
one (which is not really a practice project at all). Thanks again for y'all's
advice see ya next time.
Till Niagara Falls!
Elaine 8-12-2002 16:39
Sorry everyone... that link doesn't work, but at least it takes you to ebay.ca!
LOL
Heather 8-12-2002 15:33
Hi Carol! Mom's are great at age-denial, aren't they?
:o)
I have no idea how I painted that so small with such tiny detail. Ask my eyes,
I think they've gone on an R&R!
HA HA HA!
(Really, I just enjoy it....)
(((HUGS))))) Don't worry, Carol, I'm sure the birthday avoidance is fodder enough
for writing when next you have the opportunity!
Heather 8-12-2002 15:32
Hi All :)
Heather - now how on earth did you paint something that detailed and that tiny???
It's beautiful! Good luck with the bidding. I'm tempted, but right now I'm saving
all my pennies for a trip to see the kids in TX in another 6 weeks.
Elaine - indeed, write whichever one calls to you. Some great author (wish I could
remember who) once said that the first million words are only practice. Try not
to label any of your works as serious or practice. Just have fun and see what
gets published!
Spent yesterday at the folks. Mommy dearest is ignoring her birthday today, but
a visit was in order. So no writing yesterday or yet today. But - my two avid
readers are begging for another installment. (Thanks Viv!) So, its nap time and
then another round of writing. Oops, no, wait -- gotta check the garden first.
:)
Have a great day everyone!
Carol 8-12-2002 14:43
JMS - personal advice, or just quotes to share?
Heather 8-12-2002 13:47
Hi again, this sleepy board of scribes!
Good news! I have officially listed my very first auction item on ebay! Please
have a peek and tell me what you think!
:oD
Ok.......if the link doesn't work, my ebay user ID is orchestrina, and all you
need do is look for me in the search form in the 'sellers'category. I don't know
if I can see straight enough to enter in that impossibly huge link addy again!
8-P
Heather Miniature painting
8-12-2002 13:45
elaine....im not a very experienced writer, but when i do have several things
going, i work on the one that pulls me to it. the one in the big pile of stuff
that sticks out.
Jon 8-12-2002 11:58
As one very talented writer put it, the difference is intelligence and grace;
the difference is art.
Cynicism is not a virtue.
JMS 8-12-2002 6:07
Elaine - what's the difference between a 'real' piece of writing and a practice
one? Why did you place single quotes around real, yet not around practice? Go
with it.
Write on whatever piece you find is going well.
Heather 8-11-2002 11:06
Randall
FYI ... Hi old times in Utah ... or ... How boring can it get?
"UTAH (County)
Orem police say four boys who drove around town throwing mashed potatoes have
been cited. Police Lt. Doug Edwards said after a mashed-potato ball was thrown
at one car, two people in two other cars started chasing the boys. The youths
were stopped by officer Kevin Arledge, who had noticed them driving erratically.
They were released to their parents. -- Ann Shields"
And I thought my hometown was dull!
Randall
Randall 8-10-2002 22:36
Randall
Hello!
Having a hard time with my sons enlistment in the AF. Our house is too big and
too quiet! Cannot keep my mind on writing at this time. I've read all the posts,
but will not comment on them. Hello Americo! Nice to hear from you.
I'm trying to work on another comedy tale, but the comedy isn't in me. Maybe next
week.
Randall
BTW... Looked at "Joes" web site. I would have posted something, but couldn't
figure out where to do it.
Randall 8-10-2002 22:26
Hello!!!
I'm not dead, nor am I currently working on a big project, I'm just TIRED. Exhausted
is more of the word I'm looking forward. I have a writing question. (How long
has it been since I had one of those?)
I have two types of projects: practice project and my "real" projects. My problem
is that of so many writers, my practice project is getting in the way of my "real"
projects and I want to write with my "real" projects but my practice project has
turned into something that is better than my other projects. Silly, but then,
I am silly a lot of the time. I need help from you more experienced writers out
there. Thanks for your advice on the topic.
By and by, how are you all? I haven't been around lately so that I could ask.
Till Niagara Falls!
Elaine 8-10-2002 22:03
Seeking adventure, horror and suspense serials, short stories and saga for
new weekly webzine.
Joe Stories, Tales and Saga Online
8-10-2002 20:55
Jerry,
I also found that a good backhand would make my nose gush. I did try to avoid
those...
Heather,
Then I'll send you some more hugs (big, wide smiles).
Now I am going to go and eat some breakfast. I can smell eggs cooking. I don't
usually eat eggs. I have weird egg issues. Today, I have a craving for them that
will not be put off. Yum!
Take care all.
Rachel 8-10-2002 13:27
Rachel - Fair enough, no snotty hugs, but regulars will be fine! :oD
Heather 8-10-2002 12:45
Never had anything cauterized, but last Wednesday when the Doctor shoved
that scope thing up my nose gave me an idea of what it must feel like. Damn that
hurt, but I now know exactly where all my sinus cavities are, and the whole path
from my nasal orifices to my larynx.
I neglected to tell him that novacain doesn't work on me, to tell the truth that
fact slipped my mind with my MD's voice in the background saying cancer - cancer
- cancer. When I have dental work done they always have to shoot me up several
times before doing the work, and this Dr. used some type swab with novacain on
it to try and deaden the area. Didn't work.
I forgot to put on my regular glasses so he couldn't see the tears in my eyes
as he probed around with that damn scope he even pulled it out once and put some
vasaline on the end as it kept getting stuck and he'd have to push harder.
It was worth it though.
I do recall in my youth having nose bleeds but only when someone backhanded me,
or I fell or something I know that taste though, it's something nobody forgets,
I think.
Jerry 8-10-2002 10:40
Heather,
My nasal passages smile and send hugs to you. Yes, big, snot hugs (bwah, ha, ha,
ha). Okay, that's a little sick. How about just hugs?
Rachel 8-10-2002 0:22
Heather,
OH MY WORD!!!! That is so funny (merry laughter). I honestly can't get past the
image of the hag. I think pain and suffering when I see that word (grin/wink).
Not that pain and suffering are anything to grin or wink about.
Big smiles to you.
Rachel 8-10-2002 0:21
OMG, Rachel, just read about your experiences, too, oh dear!
((nasal hugs)) to you, too!
Heather 8-10-2002 0:18
Rachel - it's a play on words, silly!
Cauterize = caught her eyes
;oD
But thinking of actual cauterization, well, simply put: OUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCH!
Guess it could be applied in other ways - such as in place of 'seared', 'singed',
or 'scorched'.
Sorry Howard.... ((nasal hugs))
Heather 8-10-2002 0:15
Howard,
I've got nose stories! I just gotta share (bwah, ha, ha, ha, ha)!
When I was a girl I had my nose cauterized on a regular basis. I had massive nosebleeds.
I have thin tissues, or something like that. I've had lots of troubles with that
sort of stuff. I think maybe that is part of why I had the aneurisms in my eyes.
I guess I'm just a delicate little thing (grins and laughter). Anyway, I had my
nose done every two weeks for several months. It was so awful. The docs felt that
they would do it till the bleeding discontinued. My parents eventually gave up.
I was a strong kid and I would kick and scream the whole way. I am talking from
my bedroom, where I would cling to my bed, dress, door, bathroom, door, sisters,
bedroom door, banister, front door, car door, (I think you get the picture). Into
the deal the woman who did my nose was a total psycho. She used to pinch my nose
when it was done and say "We'll make some scare tissue pretty little one!" My
mum was shocked when the doc did that. She told her she didn't like it. The woman
tried to defend it. In future, she didn't make any comments. She just pinched
my nose. Heck that hurt. I can remember times when my nose would bleed till I
was pretty much passing out, it would bleed after I was down for the count. Sometimes
I thought I might just bleed to death. My mother and father wouldn't know what
to do. I would be sitting at my desk and my nose would just start to gush. I'm
not talking a little drip. It was as if somebody had turned on a tap. As my gushers
continued I got to know when I would have one. I always tasted metal and salt
before my nose would gush. I admit that I did break my nose three times by the
age of nine. I was sort of a reckless/accident prone kid. That likely had something
to do with all of it. I still get nosebleeds when the weather is dry. They aren't
as bad as they used to be. I can't think of the last time I had one continue for
more than twenty minutes. I feel bad for anyone who went thought the cauterization
experience. It is nasty, nasty, nasty! I guess that is why I can't think of it
as a roman